Why are teenagers so whackadoo?

I’m not kidding. My teenagers have given us a run for our money ever since the oldest one turned 13. I have to color my hair more often and have days when I feel like I look like this:

What is it about teenagers that make them so incredibly nutso?! I mean I was never like that right?

Let’s just put this into perspective. My oldest is now 17 and starting to outgrow his ridiculous behavior. When he turned 13, I swear aliens invaded his body and turned my sweet considerate little boy into a belligerent jerk-face. I had to go from conversations about Legos to conversations about helping contribute to the household by doing chores even if you don’t think your stepdad is cool anymore. These turned to screaming matches and ultimately at 15, he decided to live with his dad full-time (because his dad lets him LITERALLY do whatever he wants). Now my kiddo has started to come over on the weekends and comes to see me during the school day all the time. He also joined the Army National Guard, so he’s starting to understand more of why his stepdad acts and believes what he does. His real dad is a push-over with no ambition who hates guns, violence, and confrontation and would NEVER even consider serving his country. Why did I marry him…oh man that’s a long story for another day.

My stepson is now 15 almost 16. He has put us through the ringer with court battles, lies, manipulations, lawyers, etc. ever since he turned 12-13. He is just now starting to realize why we have rules and why we have high expectations. He said this morning that this year is the best year he’s ever had in school because he has “no drama” now compared to prior years when every day was FULL of drama. I think it has to do more with him taking fewer traditional school classes and more virtual classes combined with realizing his mother is a drama-queen biotch who just wants to stir the pot wherever she can than him actually growing up yet. He’s still teetering on the brink of teenager whackadoo, so we’re not out of the woods yet.

My daughter is now 14. She is just ridiculous. She has taken whackadoo to a whole new level. She has just literally within the past 6 months decided she hates her stepdad and no matter which sibling he is talking to or disciplining, she has a nasty sassy put-down to throw at him. It finally boiled over the other night, and my beloved yelled at her some not-so-nice-or-appropriate comment or two. Last night, I had yet another conversation about her behavior. I eventually asked her if she thought I was stupid. Yes I know, I was literally opening that door for her. However, to her credit, she didn’t walk through and said, “No I don’t think you’re stupid at all”. Which led to me pointing out that I chose my husband, her stepdad, for a reason-He is a good man with a good heart who would take a bullet for any of us and would move heaven and earth to give all of us a good life. I asked her to consider a different viewpoint and think about the context of future implications of behavior before she opens her mouth with a smart comment. Did it/will it work? I don’t know. But I do know she went all night without any smart comments, sassy attitude, or fights. Thank God.

Now I also have a 10 year old who has recently been diagnosed with Asperger’s and depression. Someone may have to hold me up or put me in a padded room if he goes to further extremes than his older 3 siblings when he turns 13. I’d like to think by the time he gets to 13, I’ve seen it all…or at least most of the crap by then. I mean, I’m also the oldest of 5 (4 of us are girls), so I’m hoping I can handle anything thrown my way.

My poor youngest at 3 doesn’t stand a chance. Shoot by the time he turns 13, I may be so exhausted he will have a whole different experience. Let’s hope not right?!

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